Photo: Cappadocia, Turkey. June 2019.
Another week, another email where I planned to send my reading list but more pressing themes landed on my heart. I want to talk to you all about confirmation this week both because I’ve been receiving an abundance of it lately, but also because I believe someone needs to read (hear) this.
I define confirmation as those little moments where life speaks back to you and affirms whatever it is you’re mulling over or trying to figure out. That doesn’t always mean the confirmation is positive — sometimes, life is telling you a resounding NO. But no, is an answer too and it likely means maybe you shouldn’t walk that way right now.
I’m writing this in LaGuardia airport after spending 9 months away + a week in Turkey on my FIRST press trip (Hallelujah!). Turkey was amazing and we can talk more about the actual travel piece of that later. But beyond the travel experience, it was amazing because it was full of confirmation at every turn. Confirmation that I really can do this being a writer thing. Confirmation that my name is in rooms I haven’t entered yet and that my gifts are making room for me (without me having to do a lot or pitch myself for every single solitary thing or STRESS). Confirmation about how I want to present myself after talking with other members of the group about journalism and influencing. Confirmation was everywhere. Life was whispering to me.
I’m reading Oprah’s latest book, “The Path Made Clear,” at the suggestion of my good friend Amber and in it Oprah talks about how our life is always speaking to us, we just sometimes fail to make the space necessary to listen. God, life, the universe, your spirit, whatever you want to call it/whatever works for you is always trying to get in conversation, in relationship, in tune.
I’m not going to tell you there’s some one best way to tap in. You have to figure out what works for you. For some people it’s meditation. For others it’s prayer. For me, it’s often travel, a sermon, therapy, and just getting quiet. When we consistently make space to hear ourselves, it gets easier to notice when our soul is speaking. When we consistently go with what our spirit is telling us, it gets easier to trust our gut and God given intuition.
Hearing is one thing, actually listening is another. I find it to be hard because it often requires me to change and change is uncomfortable. Sometimes, I just want to do the bad, unhealthy thing. I don’t always want to be evolving and growing and trying to be better. What’s so wrong with my baser, messier instincts? A ton (but that’s for another email). The thing that I’ve learned though is that I have to call those pieces of myself in. For me, it’s not about being healthy or even happy 100% of the time — it’s about giving way to the joy and going where my spirit is leading me. It’s about feeling my feelings without getting bogged down or caught up in them. It’s about leading with love and living in peace. That might mean spending a Monday without social media or taking a nap instead of sending an email. It might mean taking a months long break from RXY to regroup (which like, if you haven’t noticed is what’s happening). It might mean buying new domain names for reasons I’m not yet sure of.
Confirmation is about the big stuff and the small stuff because you have to be faithful over a few to be given access to more. And I’m still working on that part. I want the sky but don’t have a handle on what’s going on down here on the ground. That’s what this summer is for — doing those things that I know will make me 10% happier, healthier and more disciplined because I deserve all the light & progress I can get. Doing it afraid. Doing it without being sure why. Believing there is always a rhyme and reason. Less fighting what is being revealed to me and more giving way even when I can’t see the staircase.
I’ve got to believe I wouldn’t be brought to it if I won’t also be brought through it.
I feel like I’m starting to ramble. But, I hope you’re hearing me. I hope you’ll start listening to what your life is saying to you. I hope that you will move on the things you know to be true for your journey even if they scare you. I hope I will too.
Can I stand with you in anything? Can I pray for you? Can I speak life into something that you’re going through, worrying about or doubting life on? What would make you 10% happier, healthier and more disciplined? Email me back and lets connect.
to be continued…
*This newsletter does use affiliate links which means if you buy something through one of the links I will get a small commission. It adds no extra cost to you. Pero like, if you were gonna buy it anyway, why not support your girl in the process?
**Reader recommended reading: Normal People by Sally Rooney.
*** I’m also apparently emailing you all on whatever day I feel led to this month. Maybe sticking to a specific day would be better, but also, I’m just glad I’m getting this out. Progress over perfection. Not letting best be the enemy of good.